Retractions and The End Point

I would like to retract any statement that conveys that I think that people from the North or any other part of the world are boring or poopy heads. I've decided that people are people...no matter where they're from. Some are sassy. Some are not, but sassy funness is not restricted to Southern American's. How silly am I?! I would also like to retract the statement I made about not liking my job that much. I've changed my mind [shocker]. I like my job. I might even love it before long. You'll find that I will probably be retracting a lot of statements because this is straight out of my head, which most of the time - okay all of the time - is pitifully imperfect. Please allow me the freedom to retract statements! My blogging future depends on it.

On a completely different note, I was running last night. And the wind was blowing - hard. And I was running against the wind [of course]. I was seriously tired. My legs were burning so bad. I was sweating like crazy [and I'm not really much of a sweater]. And I felt certain that my lungs were going to explode, but I had to reach my end mark. I give myself end marks that I HAVE to run all the way to before I can take a break and walk. I'm a goal setter, which I think I've mentioned before. Well anyway, I started to think about how slowly I was actually running and how I really wasn't covering much ground very quickly. Then, make-things-into-analogies me compared it to my life. Mostly it's in my walk with Jesus. I feel like I'm always running against the current. Always tired. Always feeling the weight of life and then that seeps into every other part of my spiritual self, making me burn and feel like I'm going to explode or implode or something. And I just really want to quit. It's like for a little while the wind stops and I'm just running, rockin' out to my Do It To It music and all the sudden Whoosh! In blows the next LONG gust of wind, pushing against me. Why do I always feel like I'm working hard to keep walking with Jesus? So in the middle of all that pondering, I got sidetracked by all the actual physical pain I was feeling everywhere. The rest of my run was spent convincing myself that I could do it...just make it to your next stop point. You can do this. You've built up your endurance. Keep your eyes on your stop point. Wind or not, you really can do this. Do it. Do it. I cheered me on. Well actually I cheered Belle [who runs with me every day] on because somehow it helps me to encourage someone - or some dog - else. Is that weird?

Well as I pondered this some more today, I began to think about how much the latter part of my thought process [the non-spiritual part] really answers my question. Why do I always feel like I'm working hard to keep walking with Jesus? Well, because it's hard work. It takes me CONSTANTLY fighting for my own joy and my own growth. Albeit I'm actually fighting against my selfish self most of the time, but I still have to fight for it. And it's good that I'm fighting for it because if I wasn't, then I would definitely be getting pretty fat and lazy just sitting around no even thinking about the existence of an end point. AND it actually encourages me to encourage others to reach their end point?! What a novel idea. Encouragement is not my spiritual gift or my any kind of gift for that matter. But I think I'm going to try and do more of it.

And do you know what my end point is [spiritually speaking of course]? It's Jesus, duh! Why is it so easy for me to forget how much I love Him? In my last post I asked if anyone had any good ideas for getting out of the funk and I did partake in the pedicure idea, which was enjoyable. Truth is, though, that I just needed to open my eyes and take another good look at my Jesus. Allow myself to be filled to my toes with His overwhelming love. Because He is powerful! And He's helping me fight...cheering me on...DRAGGING me on when I just think "Seriously, though. I'm done." In church on Sunday, I found myself wanting to stand on my pew grinning [If I was brave enough, I probably would have] and singing the end of that beautiful medley "...Jesus commands my destiny. 'Til He returns or calls me home, Here in the power of Christ I stand!" What a great declaration for us to make!

So, I'm going to keep on running...even if it is uphill, against the wind, and all my limbs feel like they're prolly gonna fall off. Because my end point is so very worth it.